My Future is Bright!!!

OK so plenty has changed since the last you heard from me.lol. I guess true love never dies!
I always told myself that my college sweetheart and I could never be just friends bc we had too much of a history...but after thinking,A LOT, I decided that I can. He and I have been through the most rocky 5 year relationship. We are the King and Queen of make up to break up. I know that sounds terrible but it all stems from horrible communication.

***From now on we will call this person JD***

Jd and I are always so happy to see eachother when we date. We only ever talk about our relationship. When there is a problem, neither one of us will say a thing..instead we will just not talk..and that falls on me. Because when i get angry I dont like to talk about the problem, especially not with him, bc i feel like everything is always a joke with him. In reality Jd has done nothing but be there for me and is always willing to talk. I see all of my mistakes.

With Jd my biggest problem is the fear of commitment. We always talk about our future, marriage, kids. it all makes me very happy, but at the same time, extremely scared. I come from a broken home. Parents have been seperated since I was around 10-11. I saw the pain my mom went through during and after the divorce. I never want to go through that or put my kids through that either.
JD and i are PERFECT for each other. In every aspect. He can always put a smile on my face no matter what I am going through. I know I could always depend on him to stand by my side. He is the man i always envisioned I would marry and have kids with. In my heart I still want all of those things, Its just my plan of execution has always been wrong. Everytime we get back together we NEVER fix the problems that we had before. So things are alwyas good for a couple of weeks and then they go back to the same drama and lack of communication. All I ever want is for us to be happy together.
I think that we have finally reached a place together that may work. We are working on being friends now. Talking everyday about our daily lives. We have also started talking about what we need to fix in our relationship and how it can be done. We are both being extremely proactive about the situation. I told him last night that it feels like i am falling in love with him all over again. Its such a great feeling to get butterflies from the littlest of things. A ghcat message is what makes me so happy now a days.
All i can say is that I hope that jd and my story ends the way we both wanted from the beginning. With us happy..thats all I want and ask for!
Something new develops in this story everyday, so stay tuned for more information...lol.